A Life Of Pessimism
by DeathWallflower
Summary: Tory has to face the trials and tribulations of being an average girl in the Wammy house, how will she cope with being treated different by others around her? As she is thrown into the deepest depth of darkness, where will she take refuge? This is an OC story, and is rated M for future violence.
1. Average

Average. That pretty much summed me up. I had an average name, a regular appearance, and an ordinary mind. My name was Tory. There was nothing special it. I obtained C's in all of my exams, and that was with revision. Definitely nothing exceptional about that either. However, if you lived in an orphanage full of intelligent crackpots, who all but grinded their arm to a stump in exams, and you were average? Then you're nothing special _at all._Although of course there were other people who were anything but intellectual, but sometimes it felt like I was the only one_._

So being common in the orphanage was pretty much looked severely down upon, because ironically Wammy's was an orphanage for intelligent children. So how exactly did I end up here? That's what I wanted to know. Maybe I got mixed up with an intelligent baby, on my way to a normal orphanage. It was an amusing thought.

I hated being nothing special, it made me feel so inferior to the brain-boxes that surrounded me, smothering me. Thus, I also despised abnormally clever people. They irritated me immensely. I had also realised that academic individuals were ridiculously stuck-up. They thought they were better than every god damned person, and they expected to be pampered over. The kids in the Wammy's orphanage thought like that too, although that way of thinking was probably fuelled by Roger, the main supervisor of the orphanage. He always bought the cleverest ones what they wanted, as it "motivated them." It was mainly the top three mad scientists of Wammy's who received anything they ask for, as they were the special cases. By mad scientists, I was referring to Near, Mello, and Matt.

Near must have had about three hundred tonnes of toys in his room. He was the first successor to L. Gosh, who wanted to succeed L? Who wanted to have the responsibility of keeping the global world safe from crime on their shoulders? Anyway, Near had white messy hair. Roger said his hair was white from the amount of stress he had as a baby; he was usually found barefooted and in white pyjamas, with a stoic expression on his angelic little baby face (not).

The second successor to L was Mello. He demanded the most expensive chocolate, and he got it. But that's not all! He actually gets the chocolate shipped from Belgium. That I swear was just favouritism at its finest. Mello had ginger straight hair that brushed his shoulders, and was in the style of a bob; fit with a full fringe. He looked just like a girl when viewed from the back. He walked around in a black leather vest and tight, black trousers, and I mean _really_tight. That bulge in his trousers wasn't just a crease in the material. It was disgusting; he was disgusting. He walked around dressed like that, and he thought it was normal. As if!

Matt was the third successor to L (The oh, holy everlasting L!). I wasn't really sure what his flaw was, as I didn't see him much. But I actually believed that he got dressed in the dark. He sported a red and white striped long sleeved t-shirt, which sometimes he covered partly with a furry beige body warmer. He also wore blue jeans tucked into high top, brown military boots and he had short red hair, dyed obviously. See what I meant about Wammy's place being full of lunatics? Anyway, Matt received all the computer games he desired. I mean come on, where were my anime box sets, Roger? Or my books that were long overdue? Oh I know where they were; they're still in the shop collecting dust as usual…

I snapped out of my thoughts. I shouldn't have let myself get so riled up. I swung my legs out of my single bed, and I had to quickly cover my squinted eyes from the glaring morning sun. I brushed my limp, wavy, mousey brown hair out of my eyes as I did so. I hated these blinds, they didn't block out anything. A yawn escaped my throat, and I stood and dragged myself over to my continuously growing floordrobe, hunting through the mound of clothes. I pulled out a simple blue dress with a collar, a grey cardigan, and black leggings, and white trainers. As I slipped the clothes on, I pondered over what we might have for breakfast. Finally ready, I made my way through the mess and pulled opened the door, which opened with a resisting click. I stepped out and turned to shut the mahogany door. As I started to turn, a hand impacted with my shoulder. I lost my footing and crashed into the dark green, plush carpet. I winced at the pain of the carpet burn and at the throbbing of where the hand had shoved me.

"Move out the way, stupid airhead!" a harsh voice sneered.


	2. The Calm Before The Storm

I looked up at the idiot who had pushed me; he was peering down at me.

"What's wrong airhead? Are you really so thick that you can't work out how to get to your feet?" the ginger haired boy mocked. Behind him, his friends laughed at his comment. The person who was sneering at me was none other than Mello, the second of L's successors.

"What's wrong? Can't you even speak like a human?" He feigned surprise.

I remained silent. His expression changed to a smirk when he heard his cronies' laughter. Suddenly a sharp pain shot through the side of my stomach, and I gasped. Then I realised the ginger freak had kicked me, hard. I rearranged my features into a scowl.

"See, I knew you could make a noise," he declared.

Clutching my side, I held onto the wall as I clambered up. My legs quivered slightly from the pain.

"But then again, you haven't made any human noises, so maybe you really do have the brain of an animal," he debated nonchalantly. His hand flicked my forehead. "Hello? Any spark of intelligence flitting around in there?" he questioned.

Okay, I had been pretty reasonable here; I wasn't stupid (well in common sense anyway). I knew that if I picked a fight with Mello, I'd be very lucky to get away with only a few bruises, but this boy! Something was seriously close to snapping somewhere inside of me. Mello suddenly clamped both of his hands to either side of my head and began to shake it It was making me feel dizzy and my neck had began to ache.

"Hello? Hello! Anyone in there?" he repeated over and over again. His followers, oops sorry, 'friends' were snickering, and it seemed like the snickers were echoing in my ears. Dear God, if you can hear me, please give me the strength to control and calm my unruly temper.

Apparently, it seemed that God wasn't listening to me, because my calm resolve shattered like a glass window being pushed against by the pressure of a strong gale. Mello was still shaking my head as I drew my small hand back. I closed my eyes; channelled all of my anger into my brave, brave hand, and as I launched my palm forward, I screamed. I don't know why, maybe to make myself stronger or maybe because I was scared of what would happen as a consequence of my short temper.

My palm collided with flesh. My head stopped being shaken. The laughing ceased. My hand prickled with pain as I dropped it to my side limply. Gasps sounded in the room; I think mine was one of them.

Then there was silence.

I dared to open my eyes, with fear building in the core of my stomach. What I saw made me wish my eyes were still shut. It was enough to make a vicious grizzly bear cry. In fact, tears burned at my lids, as if to let me know of my mistake.

Mello's face was wrinkled in disgust. His eyebrows were knitted together, as if he couldn't comprehend that someone had just hit him, his mouth was turned down into a frown of disapproval, and his eyes were a swirling concoction of volcanoes, which were about to erupt and unleash their fury. His whole face radiated the heat of pure anger, and it smothered me. But then his face dropped back into a neutral expression. Was this a miracle? Did God actually hear me? Was I saved?

"Who the hell do you think you are?" He closed his eyes, his face remaining stoic.

Oh no, oh no, oh no. You stupid, foolish, silly girl, I thought to myself. Why did I think he was going to let me off? My heart began to beat rapidly and my breathing quickened.

This was the calm before the storm.


	3. The Beginning

**Disclaimer: Death Note is not mine**

**AN: Here is the new chapter, hopefully you enjoy it. I just want to say thanks to my beta reader Empyreal Phoenix for helping me with the story.**

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><p>I stood there in the hallway. The wall was slowly closing in on my claustrophobic figure. I cursed myself for striking Mello. I had heard rumours about what happened to the unlucky few who went against him and didn't obey every stupid order he gave. One boy was bullied for a few months by Mello, and he eventually hung himself. Yeah, it was that terrible. There was no doubt that I'd get the same treatment, or worse… Would Mello be able to make me kill myself? I would like to think that I was better and stronger than that. But in all honesty, the reason was that I was just a coward who wouldn't have the guts to commit suicide.<p>

I stood there now, rooted to the ground like a tree that was an unwilling subject to the cruel blows of humans.

"I said what do you think you're doing?" Mello repeated through gritted teeth.

I trembled from the ferocity of the words. Just say sorry, that's all I had to do, and then pretend to be his follower for the rest of my time in this condemning place. I just had to say sorry, and he may have let me off. Of course, I didn't. With me being me, of course I had to grip onto my stupid pride like a fool. I gathered all of the broken pieces of my courage, which were floating aimlessly around my soul, and I put them together in an awkward pile.

"Because you deserved it for hurting me in the first place!" I yelled weakly.

Mello's eyes widened with rage at being shouted at, and then they returned faithfully back to their neutral state. That was it. That was it, right there. The look of confirmation. A smirk elongated on his face. He narrowed his eyes, and then dragged his snake-like tongue over his lips like a predator appreciating its meal before it feasts. The tears were still threatening to spill out of my tears duct, and down my pasty cheeks. I was the next victim of this intelligent, wild-eyed boy, I was sure of it.

"You're pathetic!" he spat suddenly.

I was too slow. My eyes locked onto his extending arm, but my reaction was too slow. The fist whipped forward. It threw itself into my gut and the savagery of the blow flung me backwards, forcing the wind out of my throat. My mouth made an 'o' shape out of pure shock. For a split second I was motionless, as if time had been stopped by the mere force of the punch. But then it resumed, and I was knocked off my feet. Tears welled up in my eyes as I was thrown back onto the once comforting green carpet, which was now to be a painful reminder of the catalyst of the hell which was about to befall my future path of fate. As I tumbled backwards onto the carpeting, another fabric burn made me flinch. I wouldn't let him hit me like this again! I just wouldn't! It was too painful! I needed to get away from here! Staggering to my feet, I turned away from the ginger fury behind me, and I sprinted away. I sprinted from him, his followers, and the agony. I heard Mello's admirers protest, but he brushed it off.

"We'll get her when there is no one around to hear her scream, so don't worry," he said maliciously, with a black chuckle in his voice. This made me quicken my pace.

I'd always fancied myself a strong and independent girl. I've always thought that no matter what, even if I was being decapitated, I would be resilient enough to handle the pain. How wrong was my egotistical brain! I had never felt _real_pain before, obviously! I didn't want to handle it; I couldn't handle it! And all from a single punch! I was such a weak pathetic little girl! It was so frustrating!

I arrived at the old abandoned lockers. One of them was conveniently open, so I slid into the small space and shut the door behind me. Once the door was shut, I put my back against the rear of the locker, slid to the floor, and held my knees against my chest, wrapping my arms tightly around myself. I sat there in the utter darkness with briny droplets pouring down my frenzied face. I did not go to class.


	4. The Aftermath

**AN: Woah, I haven't updated in so long O.O Sorry about that. Anyway here is the new chapter.**

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><p>I opened my eyes to darkness. Racking my brain, I tried to remember where I was. My mind was a mess of fuzzy memories; then slowly, the recent events drizzled back into my consciousness. The rising fear forming a knot in my stomach, making it hard to breathe. I took in my surroundings and realised that I had fallen asleep in the locker. A pain was throbbing painfully from the joints of my legs as they had been bent the whole of the time I had been asleep. My back ached from the upright position it had acquired slumping against the claustrophobic metal walls, and it begged for relief. I needed to get out of there.<p>

Straining, I lifted a leg, bending it at the knee slightly to conform to the small space. I set my foot against the locker door, pulled it back, and kicked the door, expecting it to open. When it didn't, a spike of panic seared through my chest, but I told myself to be calm. The door only needed a bit of force. I placed my foot in the same position and launched it against the metal entrance. It still didn't budge. My eyes widened at this, and I started to pummel my foot against the door over and over again, making a loud bang every time it impacted with the steel. After doing this many times, an ache grew in my raised leg. I let it fall to the ground again, which only bought me little relief as the pain of my leg being bent returned.

My heart pounded against my chest, making resonating echoes sound in my ears. The coil of anticipation in my stomach had been multiplied, gripping my intestines, as if they were a harsh reminder that I should be afraid. Suddenly I felt angry. I was scared, frustrated, and just downright exhausted. This anger often appeared when situations didn't go my way and now it was back again. It poured heavily into my soul, turning me into a frenzied disarray of chagrin.

Again I lifted my leg and conveyed all of my frustration into the limb and catapulted it towards the door. In my rage, there was a part of me inside that was sighing in disappointment as it half expected the door to stay shut, but as my leg struck the alloy door, it swung open with a crash. This surprised me, and all of my rage disintegrated. I dumbly stared at the open space outside of the locker. I then attempted to get out by easing myself through the slim entrance without causing myself too much pain. I finally pulled myself out, and I sat in the same position I had been in the locker on the cold tiled floor. Slowly, I stretched my right leg and winced at the agony, and then the soreness abated after a second. Then I stretched my other leg and the same feeling occurred. After doing this, I leaned my back against the locker behind me, the cool feeling of the steel soothing my aching back. I couldn't bend my back obviously, so I was just going to have to endure the throbbing. As I hauled myself to a standing position, I cried out at the agony which ran up and down my back like an eager jogger. Then I started to hobble away in the direction of my bedroom.

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><p>Before I reached my bedroom, I glanced out of a window that I passed. It was pitch black, apart from the full moon glowing through the window omnisciently. It was like an eye had been planted into the sky, scrutinizing my every move. A thought struck me, which made me halt my steps. What if ran into Mello? I closed my eyes and whimpered. This thought made tears start to burn at the red, internal flesh of my eyes. But wait, I thought. I stared through the window again. Mello was probably asleep. This banished the droplets of fear away from my perception, I sighed and then I continued on to my private chamber of loneliness. But I proceeded with caution, watching out for Mello at every corner.<p>

When I arrived at my door, I checked both to the right and the left. Making sure there was no one who had seen me, I unlocked the door, sidled in and then shut and locked it behind me. Leaning back against the door, I shut my eyes. A sense of comfort washed over me as I released all tension from my muscles. After standing there for a few minutes, I set my eyes free. They glanced around the room, almost on their own, as if they had recognised my exhaustion and had taken up the responsibility of working by themselves.

_The window was open._

I had a sharp intake of breath and then I shot over to the window, tripping and clambering over the unavoidable mess in my room. I clasped my hand around the handle of the window and slammed it shut, catching the lock at the same time. Then I spun around and looked at the whole room through my narrowed eyes. Eventually, after what seemed like many minutes had passed, I concluded that there was no change to my room and that no one was in here. I walked shakily to my bed, pulled the duvet back, and sat down, still glancing around. It occurred to me that I had opened the window when I had woken up as I had been sweltering on that innocent morning.

I didn't bother with changing for bed; it made me feel vulnerable, so I only kicked my shoes off, lay down on the plush mattress, and covered myself with the duvet. The mattress felt spongy and was a welcome comfort as all my agitation was exiled; as a consequence, I let out a groan of contentment. I shut my eyelids and felt the eagle of unconsciousness carry me into a dreamless slumber.


	5. Paranoid

**AN: Hi, sorry it's been so long since I've updated this, but I've made a chapter plan and I know what I'm doing with the story, so hopefully I won't have any big intervals between chapters.**

**I hope you enjoy ^^**

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><p>The next morning, I opened my eyes to the sun shining through the crack of my blinds, illuminating the piles of dirty clothes and piles of books that were spread about the floor. I then focused on my body, realising that it was still aching from my previous night spent in the locker. It felt like my limbs were creaking as I pushed myself up from the bed. I then slumped against the wall, which was to my left, and held my head in my hands. The events of yesterday were slowly returning to my mind, and my head started to pound with worry.<p>

What was I supposed to do now? I didn't want to stay in my room for the rest of the time that I was in the orphanage, but...if I went out of my room; I'd walk into Mello at some point. I shuddered at the thought. I couldn't believe that so much had changed since yesterday. Yesterday, I was fine, sure I felt slightly alienated from most of the residents in the orphanage but I was considerably comfortable, I was invisible and no one bothered me. Now, I felt like I feared for my life. At this thought my hands started to shake with fear, I started to whimper at the idea that Mello could kill me. Then my rationality kicked in. Mello wouldn't go that far. He wouldn't, he had too much to lose. Well, that's what I tried to convince myself anyway.

I really needed to decide what to do, I felt like I was trapped in a small room, with nowhere to get out. It was horrible. I realised I was holding my breath and quickly breathed in some oxygen. Sighing, I decided that I needed to go out of my room at some point; people would get suspicious if they became aware that I never came out. So why not go out as soon as possible. Anyway, I had already put fuel to the fire by standing up to Mello, and it was my own fault. If I don't go and face the music, I would always be scared. I didn't want to be a coward like that. Besides it couldn't be that bad, could it?

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><p>I was walking along the carpet in the corridor, the dark green plush material reminding me of yesterday, but I shook my head and pushed the memory away from the consciousness of my brain and carried on walking, my destination being the hall where everyone in the orphanage goes to for meal times. I looked straight ahead with my eyes focused on a fixed point in front of me. I held my arms by my sides and walked quicker as the thought that Mello could walk around the corner, entered my mind.<p>

When I reached the hall, my first instinct was to go and find the most indistinguishable seat, but then I remembered that I was meant to be strong and brave. Queuing up in the line for food, I glanced around the hall, my eyes flitting around, searching for Mello. Then I stopped, deciding that it would be better to not see him. I continued to look around for a seat though, as I took tiny steps forward, following the queue as it moved along gradually. I spied a seat in the corner that was extremely invisible. Despite my resolve, I chose the inconspicuous seat. Feeling ashamed of myself as one of the canteen workers poured some cornflakes into my china bowl, causing a tinkling sound. I splashed some milk onto the cornflakes and then proceeded to my chosen seat.

After I was seated, I sifted through my cornflakes making sure to drown them all in the milk. Occasionally I glanced around, but I kept my back hunched over to make sure that I was ultra-invisible. However I could tell that I was being stared at, I could feel eyes piercing into my skin. Two girls a few seats away from me were tittering and I glanced at them, sure that they were talking about me, but was relieved when they were laughing at a piece of paper, and they didn't glance my way once. I was just being paranoid.

I quickly swept my eyes over the rest of the hall, and to my dismay realised that a few people looked away when my eyes locked onto them. So people were talking about me! Why were they talking about me?! Is it possible that everyone knew about what had happened with Mello yesterday? It was a corridor used by everyone after all! Oh God, did everyone know something I didn't? I felt the chagrin burn my cheeks and I quickly looked at my bowl of cereal and concentrated my gaze there whilst I brought the stainless steel spoon to my mouth, and re-loaded it with the flaky cereal. However I felt like I was going to throw up, so I took my half-eaten bowl of cereal to the washing up rack, keeping my head down. Then I hurriedly walked to exit of the hall, unable to resist a quick glance at the heads of the many seated people. I didn't miss a few stares of pity. I spied a flash of shocking white hair whilst my eyes roamed the seating area; I focused on it. It was Near; he was being anti-social as usual and was playing with his cereal. It seemed like he was bored. I suddenly remembered that Near was also a victim of Mello's bullying, and for some reason, I felt a pang of empathy, as well as a sense of community with a person who I assumed was going through the same horror as I was. It wasn't enough to make me happy or smile, but as I turned away to go back to my room for the rest of the day, I held onto the shimmering silver lining of hope that I was not alone.


	6. Threats

**AN: Hey Guys, here is a new chapter. I'm going to start updating this story more frequently, due to fact that I have it planned out.**

**Also, I know that it seems like the story is rather slow, but trust me it will definitely start getting more exciting. :) So please enjoy! :)**

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><p>It was midday, and the sky was smothered with heavy, grey clouds. Rain drizzled down to the earth, dampening the mood of the inhabitants of Wammy's, whom were cooped up inside the humid space of the orphanage. Due to the weather, many children were studying for the upcoming exam. The exam was a monthly test to reinstate the league tables of the most intelligent kids. So a lot of people were revising to become the top. However, I was not doing this. Instead, I was sitting by a window, cross legged with my elbows resting on my legs and my hands cupping my chin, in the playroom. Which had been made for the younger residents of the orphanage.<p>

I watched the droplets of the light rain land gracefully on the window pane, and then slide down the glass in all directions as they raced each other. I looked around the room I was sitting in; the majority of the children were gathered around one of the minders, who was reading a story to them. Which, judging by the extracts I heard every now and again, wasn't the typical book that you'd read to toddlers and kids. I sighed in exasperation and turned back to looking out of the window, wiping a drop of sweat off my forehead, which had been forced out of my flesh by the stifling, humid air. Then I wiped the residue of the sweat that had remained on my hand, onto the beige carpet floor, which covered the ground of the whole room.

I had chosen to sit in this room because I doubted Mello would try to do anything to me, as there were quite a few minders, who were looking after the children. I felt at ease here, a wave of tranquillity rippling through my body as I focused on the calmness of my surroundings. I felt calmer now, calmer than the past few days. The drips of rain pattering onto the glass window complimented the voices of adults and the murmuring whispers of the attentive children. It had stayed this way for me, for at least a few days. However, on the sixth day, the weather had picked up again. The sun shone painfully through the window that I had sat by for the last few daytimes. The minders had taken the children out to play on the newly sun baked concrete and well fed grass blades.

Therefore the playroom had been left unoccupied apart from myself. A sense of unease had been niggling at my stomach all day, due to the fact that the minders were not here to protect me. I shook the thought out of my mind and stood up, pulling the string that allowed the blinds to fall down and shut, so that the sun was blocked out by their plastic bars, refusing the ball of immense burning solar heat the ability to burn me. I sat back down and leaned against the mint green painted wall that was by my left side. Before I knew it, my eyes were drooping and my vision became blurry, and then was shrouded in the black enigma of unconsciousness.

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><p>I felt a slight sear of pain on my forehead, which had intervals of five seconds. The consistent irritation was stirring me from my peaceful slumber. I wiggled my nose, trying to stop the pain, so I could fall back to sleep and to my surprise it did stop, and I let out a sigh of content, but then a voice slithered into the complex system of my ear drums.<p>

'Wake up, air brain, I want to play,' the voice drawled. It sounded familiar, but not in a good way. I couldn't quite figure out who it was, but then in my half asleep state my subconscious threw forward the answer into my consciousness and my eyes shot open in unadulterated dread.

'Oh, I see you finally woke up, you lazy person,' the sardonic voice continued. My eyes locked onto a figure that was standing above me, his ginger bob framing the face that always filled me with fright. His pale pink, almost peach lips were turned up into an ugly sneer, as his eyes looked down upon my newly awakened body. I suddenly felt a sense of terrified chagrin. There was something degrading that I utterly loathed about being woken up by none other than Mello. It disgusted me and made me shiver that he was the one to see me in the vulnerable state of sleeping. It felt like he had invaded my privacy and had intruded on my personal life. I quickly lurched to my feet, to rid of the disadvantage of being below Mello and his stupid friends (whom I had just noticed standing behind him). I looked Mello straight in the face, after I had gained a steady stance. I glared involuntarily, causing Mello to let out a snicker. Then, all of a sudden, his strong hands collided with my shoulders, and forced me back against the wall. The solid drywall winding me. I let out a gasp at the impact and heard the other boys that were spectating, titter. I scowled at them and then focused on Mello's face once again that had come considerably close to mine, whilst he still kept me pinned to the wall with his iron grip that was ridiculously unnatural for a boy of almost eleven years old.

Thinking of his age reminded me of my shame of being pushed around a little brat that was one year younger than me. I shouldn't put up with this! I'm older than him; he should be scared of me! But despite my frustration, I was still petrified of him. Of his physical stature, (He towered over my short height, so it seemed like he was older than me) of his intelligence, and obviously of what he could do to me. Mello's eyes were burning with ferocity as they bored into mine, probably relishing the different terrified emotions that flashed over my face. His fierceness sent a cold shiver running down my spine. Mello's sadistic grin revealed his bone white teeth, which looked as if they could pierce through my skin and rip me into shreds in a few seconds. More tremulous shudders travelled through my body.

'Oh poor little girl, am I scaring you?' Mello interrupted my train of thought, drawling his question. Again, his friends let out snide chuckles. I tried to struggle out of Mello's grip, but it was no use, he had me locked in. I wished that a minder would walk through the door and release me from this monster's claws! Tears began to well in the corner of my eyes and I whimpered, which didn't go unnoticed by Mello.

'Ha, you're petrified aren't you?! You should see your face it's pathetic! But it's delicious!' I cringed at his words. He was such a sadist! A sick, twisted sadistic freak! I suddenly felt a surge of anger run through my body and release a dose of adrenalin, which gripped onto me and caused me to spit out careless words.

'You're sick! You're such a freak! You're just a stupid little freak, who picks on others so that you can cover up all of your own problems! And who do you think you are, calling me a little girl?! I'm a year older than you! You sick, disgusting freak of nature! All you are is just a bratty little kid with an inferiority complex!' I was breathless, and was gasping for air, as I had yelled at Mello. I knew I had angered him. The furiousness of his screwed up face told me so. I tried to convince myself that I wasn't scared, yet despite my attempts the fear still crept upon me and I started trembling. He was going to hurt me. He was really going to hurt me.

Mello released his grip from my shoulders but still kept his head near mine, invading my personal space again.

'Listen, you stupid airhead! I may be a brat in your eyes, but I'm an intelligent brat, right?' A gleam of malicious intent radiated from his being. 'And I'm going to damn well use my intelligence to discover hundreds of ways to make you scream in pain and make you suffer!' Mello had started yelling at me, with a victorious tone etched into his malevolent threats. As his words were carved into my brain, I started to convulse in horror. A tear slipped out of my left eye as I realised that I had walked into the spider web of a venomous spider that was thirsty for blood.

'I'm not going to hurt you now, though, you little bitch. Oh no, I'm going to pounce on you when you least expect it. When you feel safe, and feel like nothing can hurt you, I'm going to hunt you down and make you squeal like a pig! Squeal like the animal you are.' Mello had lowered his voice to a menacing whisper, which made his threats seem all the more violent, due to the secrecy of them.

By now, the tears were streaming down my face and my whole body felt weak and fragile. I only stayed standing due to leaning against the wall that was behind me. My teeth were clacking together in utter dread, and I almost collapsed. However, I still felt the need to retain some shred of my stolen dignity so I willed myself to stay standing up. Mello continued speaking in his fierce snarl that made him appear so animalistic.

'So airhead, don't go doing anything silly like killing yourself, because we are going to have so much fun! But, mark my words, if you tell anyone, about our little arrangement! Well let's just say that you won't be joining the afterlife in one piece.' At this point, I had started gasping for oxygen, as my hysterical tears and horror at Mello's words had caused my throat to clench up. Mello snickered, and then ordered his friends to leave with him. All of them mockingly laughing, as they walked out of the playroom entrance.

As the last step padded out of the doorway, the door slammed shut and the playroom was silent once again. Apart from my stricken cries. Realising that I was alone, my knees wobbled underneath me and I fell to the floor. I didn't even have the energy to sit up so I just lay on the carpeted floor, my tears soaking the area around my face as the ball of pure fear that Mello had created, was lodged in the deepest part of my gut; it wrapped its spiteful tendrils around my soul, refusing to be moved, leaving my body shaking and convulsing from my wracking sobs.


	7. Attack

I was sitting in my room again, watching one of my favourite anime series on my small TV; leaning against the side of my bed with my knees drawn up to my chest and my arms wrapped around my legs. It was five in the morning and a gale roared around outside of my bedroom window. The branches of an adolescent sapling that had been planted outside of my room were being smacked against the double glazing glass, as if the wind was trying to smash through so that it could carry me away in its blustery arms. I ignored the fact that the idea was appealing to me.

It had been another two days since the day that Mello had condemned me to a future of living hell. I had braved going out of my room for a couple of days, but only because the playroom had once again, been occupied by both children and minders alike. However, Mello's threat still rang through my head like an alarm bell that wouldn't go away. I feared that Mello would be there whenever I stepped out of my room, or whenever I turned a corner. I had also started avoiding going past his room. I had taken precautions to lock my window up tight at all times, as well as my door when I was in my room.

My focus on the current anime episode had completely wandered as I pondered on whether I should take the risk of leaving the safe sanctuary of my room to go sit in the playroom today. However I really didn't want to feel my heart tighten as I walk around Wammy's, or have my heart start pounding whenever someone walked past me. I was exhausted by always being on guard. I never wanted to feel it again! I had decided that I was dead-set on staying in my room permanently for a while. Apart from meal times. Luckily classes were not on, as we were having our summer holiday that had recently started. I couldn't really enjoy the freedom though.

* * *

><p>My hands held a well thumbed book, my finger pulling a page back every so often, feeling the gentle roughness of the paper as I did so. I was halfway through this particular book, (which was the third book I had read), as a result of doing nothing but reading whilst I had locked myself away in my room for the past week. I changed my reading position to lying down on my bed, which I had been previously sitting on whilst leaning my back against the white washed wall that the low bed had been pushed up against. I had laid on my back, and held the book I was reading, above my face. My raised arms had already begun to ache so I decided to change my reading position again. I was just about to flip over onto my front, so that I could rest my arms as I was reading, when the sound of a bell clanged three times. It could be heard all over the orphanage and it signified that it was time for me to start making my way to the dining hall. I didn't have an appetite at the present moment but I decided to go and eat anyway as I would have probably gotten hungry later on. I sat up and dog-eared the corner of my page, due to a lack of a bookmark. I then slipped on my black shoes and stood up, walking towards my bedroom door. I opened the door and stepped out, closing it behind me.<p>

When I turned right, to start walking towards the dining hall; I saw Mello, surrounded by his 'friends'. He was just about to turn the corner that I was supposed to be walking towards. If I had stayed quiet, he wouldn't have noticed me. He would have kept on walking around the corner, disappearing out of my sight. If I had stayed quiet, everything would have been okay. But I didn't stay quiet, I gasped out of shock at finally seeing him. It was loud enough for Mello to become curious. I saw him incline his head in my direction to find out the source of the noise. A look of excited shock flashed across his face when his eyes locked on to me. It was a similar look that one gives when running into a friend unexpectantly. Not that I'd know what that feels like. Well not anymore anyway.

I hurriedly looked around the corridor, my stomach dropping when I realised that the hallway was empty. I looked back towards Mello and saw him murmuring to his friends, causing them to look in my direction. Everything seemed to go in slow motion. It felt like my heart had frozen when they turned and started to walk towards me. My mind also seemed to be working in slow motion. I wondered what I should have done, but it was hard to think when my heart was picking up as the mob was closing in on me. So I decided to follow one of the most mundane human instincts.

I ran away.

Now everything seemed to go back to normal speed. I was sprinting away from my worst nightmare, and they had quickly recovered from their shock and had begun to give chase. I was surprised at how fast I was running, however it wasn't enough. They were catching up, so I forced myself to go faster; a pain was building up in my chest as my body began to perform anaerobic respiration. Despite my quick speed, I was still shorter than all of the people chasing me, so their longer legs covered more ground and they were still closing in on me. I could hear their footsteps behind me, and I began to scream out of terror. Like when you are being chased in a game, but worse.

All of a sudden I felt one of my predators catch up to me, and kick me ridiculously hard in the back of my knees. I wobbled whilst still running, but I stumbled up and began to run properly again, but then the person who had kicked me, threw their body weight against me and I went flying at least a few inches before I fell and tumbled to the ground, the carpet burning my hands, which I had put out instinctively in front of me to break my fall. The impact with the floor had winded me. The fact that I was panting, due to my body trying to take in the oxygen that it had lost was also making me choke as I tried to frantically take in air. Yet, my animalistic impulse still urged me to keep moving, so I tried to scramble up off the floor, but a foot stomped hard onto my back, forcing me back to the ground. My face was pushed against the floor, suffocating me, so I turned my head to the side. My back was throbbing, yet the foot still remained there. I gave up trying to struggle to get up, so I just let my body go limp, whilst I regained my breath.

'That's better! Isn't it so much better when we cooperate?' Mello's voice spoke amongst the heavy breathing. My chest tightened at the sound of his snake like voice. I didn't answer him.

'Although, it was fun chasing you. It was like hunting down an _animal_,' Mello snickered, emphasising the word animal. He continued talking in his condescending voice.

'However, I must punish you for your misbehaviour, because it seems that you still need to be tamed.' My breathing was almost steady at this point, but the threat from Mello had made me stop breathing, as a sense of dread caused my stomach to clench up. As I tried to control my breathing, I realised that it had gone silent and I wondered what was happening. I heard no movement, so I wondered if they were communicating by mouthing to each other, or maybe they had some special code to communicate by. The idea sounded silly, but with Mello anything could be possible. The foot had still remained on my back, I wondered whose foot it was, and the idea that it may have been Mello's made me shudder. Mello's voice suddenly broke the suspenseful silence.

'Ah, I have the perfect retribution for you,' Mello snarled. Apparently he had been thinking. His gang of freaks were obviously used to his behaviour. Mello began to order all five of his friends around, telling one of them to go fetch some rope, whilst telling the others to carry me to the usual spot. I listened with horrified contempt, as I began to panic. What the hell were they going to do to me?! I began to breathe heavily with fright. I decided that I should try screaming. I sucked in a big mouthful of air and then let my voice out as high as it could go, whilst struggling. I heard them all start to panic, but Mello said nothing. Then, I felt a sharp crack of pain whip through my head as I realised I had been punched. I lost consciousness.

* * *

><p>I stirred from my forced sleep and as the events of earlier flashed through my brain, panic shot into my stomach, and my eyes snapped open. The first thing I set eyes on was the wretched sight of Mello standing before me. He was watching me with a smirk. He was being intrusive again, and stripping me of my dignity. I tried to struggle away but realised that I was physically refused movement. I focused on what was stopping me from getting away. Looking down, I saw that it was rope. It was pulled around me so tightly that it was cutting into my skin. My arms were tight against my side and whenever I tried to struggle the rope burned my skin. I screamed in frustration. Realising that it was useless to try and get away I stopped moving, and the rope burns were getting quite painful.<p>

I focused on Mello and realised that his friends were by his sides. They were just staring at me coolly. Looking around my surroundings I realised I was in a forest, which led me to the conclusion that I was tied to a tree. It must have been the forest that bordered the garden of Wammy's however; I was confused because there was a humongous chain link fence that was lined with barbed wire at the top separating the forest from Wammy's garden. How did Mello and his friends get through it? I ignored the thought as I felt some sharp bark digging into my bare arm, and I was sure that it had pierced my skin. Looking back at Mello and his cronies, I realised that they were waiting for me to speak. I refused and we were in silence for a long while. I was trying to think of a way out of this, but it seemed to be a dead end situation. I didn't have anything to cut the rope, and even if I did, I would probably get lost in the forest as it seemed we were deep in the wood. My heart picked up as I had a scary thought that Mello planned to kill me, and I whimpered. Mello gave out a nasal laugh. I refused to look at him.

'You're so scared! I love it! I bet your screams are even better!' Mello shouted in excitement. His friends were silent. I moved my eyes to Mello and glared at him.

'What are you going to do to me?!' I yelled back. Mello gave me an evil sneer.

'You should be quiet. Animals don't speak,' Mello warned. Yet once again my senseless anger broke through.

'You're the animal! What kind of humane person ties a girl up! I haven't even done anything to you!' I shrieked. Mello responded instantly.

'Ha! You're not a girl! You're a dirty, unintelligible animal! You're clearly a wild one at that, so I'll have to teach you to behave!' Mello roared whilst stepping closer to me. I leaned my head against the tree as if I could step away from him. I struggled against the ropes again. But again, gave up and leaned against the tree to try and be even an inch away from Mello.

'Screw you,' I said simply. Mello retorted by throwing his fist into my stomach; which had conveniently been left bare of any rope. I grunted in pain, and gasped for air. I had lost count of how many times Mello had left me fighting for breath. I heard him laugh menacingly. I glared at him again, flaunting defiance. He noticed this and smiled sadistically, knowing that he had the upper hand. He then thrusted his foot into my abdomen, heightening the pain of the previous blow. Yet I still glared at Mello as if he wasn't hurting me. I didn't know where I was getting all of this false confidence from, because I felt scared stiff of the idea of being hurt more. Yet my body wasn't showing the inner turmoil of my soul. Maybe it was because I was in a hopeless situation. My train of thought was disrupted by a sharp pain searing through my stomach as Mello had launched his elbow into my abdomen, resting all of his weight into the one blow. The shock of the force caused my mind to go blank of any thought. My head leaned forward as a gurgle escaped my throat. I was really struggling to breathe now. Mello stood up to his full height again and crossed his arms.

'You were thinking. Animals are not supposed to think,' He growled. My eyes were wide and watering. I had taken three hard hits to the gut and now my knees were weak, yet the rope ironically still held me up. I became so furious with this situation. Why was this happening to me?! Why did Mello have to choose me to bully?! Was it because I wasn't intelligent enough? Why did I have to be punished for something that I could not help? I loathed Mello with all my being. It was his fault that my life was no longer peaceful. It was his fault that I feared going out of my room every day, and he relished that fact! He had totally monopolized my apprehension and he loved it!

'I hate you!' I suddenly screeched in his direction. He didn't even flinch. Some part of me hoped that someone would hear, would rescue me, but that was impossible. We were so deep in the forest that I didn't even have an inclination of what way to go to get out!

'Scream all you like. No one will hear you,' Mello stated coolly.

At that, Mello ordered his pack of wolves to rip me apart. I was on the receiving end of brutal punches, volatile kicks and pain that seemed to be immeasurable for my frail body. I was violently bludgeoned everywhere but my face, and all whilst I was tied to a tree. I couldn't even move whilst I was beaten to a pulp. I stopped screaming and struggling after what seemed like half an hour later. My head was drooping as tears seeped freely out of my tears ducts, and mingled with dripping snot as they run down my face. My body sagged, only being held up by the rope.

Finally, they stopped, and I didn't even have the strength to glance up. I wondered if they would leave me tied up here to die. I heard a mechanical sound and looked up. Mello had his Swiss army knife out, that he had flaunted many times. He flipped out the blade part of it, its stainless steel metal reflecting the light that peeked through the treetops and a spark of panic went through me, but Mello brought the knife to the ropes and sawed through them. When I was freed, I fell to the floor, unable to stand. I heard Mello say something about covering up the bruises, if I wanted to live, but it was lost in the haze of thoughts as I fell into a comatose state.


	8. Roger

Pitter patter, pitter patter. That was the pattern of the drizzling rain that was dripping onto my face, as I observed the grey, lacklustre cloudy sky above me. I was laying on what seemed to be the dewy grass, facing the pale blue surface of the sky. I had winced at the soreness in my body when I had gained consciousness. Although the thought of how I had acquired the aching made me cringe even more. I began to wonder at my whereabouts. I could feel blades of grass matting against my palms, and I turned my head to the right, discovering that I was quite a distance from Wammy's house. Then I turned my head to the left and saw the chain link fence that bordered Wammy's garden for protection, was a few centimetres from me. I tried to remember how I had got here. Hadn't I been in the forest? Brushing the pointless thought out of my mind, I noticed the rain had started to get heavier, and was beginning to make my clothes cling slightly to my sore skin.

With a heaving sigh, I pushed myself up from the now, wet ground, my hands digging into the squelchy mud as they supported my body weight My joints seemed to creak as I moved, whilst pain ransacked my torso and limbs. I whimpered and screwed my eyes shut as I continued to haul myself up from the ground, grabbing onto the metal fence to keep myself steady.

* * *

><p>I had finally made my way back to my warm, comforting and secure room. It had been a painful journey as I had been making my way back to the orphanage, and it felt as if it had taken hours to make it back along that five minute journey, which was due to the agony of my body causing me to walk slower. I looked my wooden, bedroom door behind me, and stumbled toward my bed that looked ridiculously inviting, but before I retired to my bed for the rest of the day, I stripped naked, throwing the sopping clothing into the corner of my bedroom. I threw on my soft, pale green dressing gown around my frame and wrapped it tight, and then I finally collapsed onto my bed, the springs groaning momentarily under my weight. I lay there for a while, my mind blank as my body rested. But the events of earlier crept upon my mind and distress and humiliation raged around my heart and I found myself curling up into a ball as wracking sobs came gasping out of my throat, leaving my body shuddering. I clapped my hands to my face and tried to suppress the tears but the racing thoughts of Mello made me even angrier and the tears kept flowing. I hated that boy so much! Even his name caused bile to rise in my throat. He made me sick! He was so evil, and I could not comprehend how someone could have the audacity to treat a person like that. To treat me like that! The memories of being brutally attacked were projected over and over in my mind, reminding me of every little punch, or kick, and the pain it delivered. I cried even more, the gasps coming out more frequently as I struggled for breath. My throat began to constrict and left my throat feeling raw. Why did I have to suffer? I hadn't done anything wrong! Maybe this was a punishment for believing that I could fit in and live alongside with the other clever kids in this orphanage!<p>

I lay on my bed for hours, with all of these negative thoughts plaguing my brain, only snapping out of the depressive trance when the dinner bell disrupted my thoughts. I ignored it, as well as ignoring the sounds of hungry, excited children making their way to the dining hall outside of my room. After hours of my reflection on being hurt by Mello, a ball of fiery anger had been given birth to in my stomach, and it gripped my gut, twisting it in rage and slicing it with its sharp humiliation and feeling of cowardice. I had finally decided that I did not want to sit around waiting for things to get better, standing up slowly from my bed, I dressed myself. I would do something about this mess before what happened earlier, happened again.

* * *

><p>Staring at the wooden panelled door, I eyed the name plaque that was nailed to it. The name 'Roger' was engraved into the plaque. I had arrived at Roger's office after finalising that despite Mello's numerous threats against me telling anyone of his bullying, I was going to tell Roger anyway. Mello couldn't hurt me if Roger was looking out for me. I lifted my right, clenched fist and rapped it against the door three times. A few seconds later, a croaky voice told me to enter. I grasped the brass handle, took in a breath and pulled the handle down whilst pushing the door open.<p>

Roger was working at his desk, as usual. He turned to look at me and he nodded at me, to let me know that he acknowledged me. I noticed the grey hairs that streaked his faded mahogany coloured hair, which framed a wrinkled face that had grown weary with age. Spectacles sat on the tip of his nose at he peered at me inquisitively.

'Why, hello Tory. What can I do for you?' Roger enquired as he sat poised in his black, leather computer chair, an expensive looking silver pen resting in the space between his thumb and index finger. I gulped, and stated my presence whilst looking at the floor, my hands fumbling together.

'Erm, well, I need…to talk to you about something…' I trailed off. I heard creaking and looked up. Roger had leaned back into his chair and placed his pen down on his ebony coloured desk, which was cluttered with white paper. He motioned towards the red, plush velvet chair that he usually reserved in his study for guests and for his naps, and told me to sit. I plonked myself down in the chair and my eyes flitted around the room. I felt nervous all of a sudden as my resolve crumbled into dust.

'So, Tory, what would you like to talk about?' I looked at him and his eyes bored into me, and I felt that he could unnervingly see everything I was thinking. I gulped again.

'Well, it's about…well, you see, I am kind of getting…picked on…' I looked down at the floor again after saying that. Roger was silent and again, I looked towards him. He had leaned forward in his chair and had clasped his hands together in a questioning manner.

'Are you getting bullied Tory?' I nodded. He sighed.

'By who, may I ask?'

'No, you may not,' I swallowed. Roger sighed again.

'Well, what kind of bullying specifically?' Roger asked. The memories of the beating flashed through my head again and I gulped again, finding it hard to take in air normally. I didn't want to tell Roger about how Mello and his friends had attacked me. But…wasn't that what I had come here for? I needed Roger's help, so I would never have to go through that again. So what was I scared about? Roger could protect me from Mello's threats…so why did I feel so hesitant about telling Roger about Mello hurting me? A comment of Mello's suddenly whipped across my mind, as I remembered that he had warned me to hide the bruises, before I had passed out. I snapped my eyes to my arms and legs and was relieved that I was wearing a long sleeved t-shirt and jeans.

'Tory?' Roger insisted, jolting me out of my internal dialogue. I stared at him, and finally answered.

'Well, he just calls me names and stuff,' I mumbled, letting my eyes flit around the room again. I heard him sigh as he contemplated my statement.

'Well, Tory, I think that you should just ignore him, and he will most likely get bored eventually, but if you tell me who he is, I could have a word with him and tell him to leave you alone?' Roger suggested.

'No!' I blurted out. I withdrew my breath as I saw his eyes widen slightly and I tried to redeem my mistake.

'I mean, I want to try and sort this out myself, because…I'll feel weak if I don't,' I say looking towards the door of the room.

'Okay Tory...I respect that, but, if it does get worse, please remember that I will always help you. Also, whatever he says are just words and words cannot hurt you,' Roger told me, smiling. I forced a smile back and thanked him whilst leaving. I rushed back to my room, realising that I didn't feel any better, but I had decided that I would take Roger's advice, and ignore Mello for the time being.


	9. Ignorance Is Bliss?

**AN: Hello! Sorry I haven't posted in a while! Stupid life gets in the way xD **

**Here's the new chapter, I hope you enjoy it! As usual thanks for the reviews :)**

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><p>The night had been a rough one. I had tossed and turned in my bed, unable to get asleep, and was sweating so much that I had thrown my duvet across the room in frustration. It wasn't even a hot night. I looked at my clock and saw that it was five o clock in the morning. I groaned in desperation, I had been trying to sleep for hours now. I was so tired yet I could not sleep for the life of me. I turned onto my back and looked at white ceiling. Sighing I brushed my hair out of my face and then I attempted to sleep for another hour, but to no avail.<p>

Giving up, I got out of bed at six o clock and decided I would while away the two hours I had before classes began; with watching one of my favourite videos on my small box TV that sat upon my old and cracked chest of drawers. After putting the video in, I glanced up at the clock whilst the video played through the trailers.

Two hours.

I wondered whether I should go to my lessons or not. I leaned forward and pressed the play button on the VHS player. I probably should go, I thought. I had decided that I was going to try and be brave and ignore Mello. I wondered if that would solve the problem. Would he get bored and then just leave me alone like Roger claimed he would?

I snickered at the word 'bully'. It sounded like such a childish term. I'd always associated a bully with just mere name calling and teasing. But this was much more than verbal assault. I pulled my knees up to my chest and buried my head in my lap, despite the fact the video feature film had already started. I meekly decided that I would go about my normal day. The fear rose in my chest at the thought of calmly walking past Mello. I let out a shaky sigh, as if the fear was bubbling out of my chest. I looked at the TV screen and tried to watch the film. Before I knew it, the clock hands had run all the way to 8 o clock.

* * *

><p>It had been two days. And much to my relief, some stroke of luck had allowed me to steer clear of bumping into Mello at all in the past couple of days. It was now the morning of the third day and I was walking to my lesson. I had left my room early in order to get to the classroom quickly. I knew that I had resolved to try and be brave, but I wasn't a masochist, and I did not want to deliberately run into Mello. I had reached the classroom and luckily Mello was nowhere to be seen, and the teacher was already inside the room. I sighed in relief. Until, I heard Mello's snarl of a voice come slithering from around the corner. My heart sped up and I quickly hurried into the classroom, remembering that we both shared this lesson. Throughout the lesson, I deliberately avoided looking anywhere near the direction of where Mello was sitting, even though I could feel his wolfish eyes boring into me, making me shift uncomfortably in my seat.<p>

After the class had ended, I was the first to rush out of the room. I hurried a few feet down the corridor, when suddenly I heard confident footsteps behind me. In a moment of idiocy, I froze. I heard his voice speak up behind me.

'Airhead! Wait up, won't you?' His voice sounded slick with mockery. My heart sped up and I remained frozen, as if in a stupor. I couldn't move my feet or even say something. I had no idea what to do and my mind had gone blank. I felt a hand clamp down on my shoulder hastily and my heart felt like it was no longer beating. Had my heart stopped? The terror was too much. I wanted to fall to the floor and curl up in a ball. I wanted to block the world out and be on my own. I wanted to be somewhere where _he_ couldn't get me. I was broken out of my trance by the sound of children emerging from the classroom I had previously been in. The hand was removed from my shoulder, and before I could even think anything I had bolted. I realised for the first time, as I was running, that he wouldn't do anything ridiculously violent around other people. I was somewhat calmed by this and by the fact that I had reached the next classroom that I was in which, fortunately, Mello was not.

Over the next few days, I stayed in places where there were big groups of children. I left the same time as other children so that I could walk with them at their steady pace to the lessons we shared. I also avoided leaving the classroom early so that I could also be surrounded by people. I was still slightly tormented by Mello, such as he would bump into me whilst walking past, or pinch me, I would ignore it though, like Roger told me to do. Once he even pushed me from behind so that I fell over, the carpet burning my bare knees. It reminded me of the first time he had begun to 'bully' me. But, none of it was as violent as the attack that I received in the forest, and for that I was grateful.

* * *

><p>It was the afternoon of the fifth day since I had resolved to take Roger's advice, and I was walking to my next lesson amongst the other kids whilst staring at the floor. I watched my shoes step forward, one ahead the other. It was a thing I liked to do, as it always fascinated me how people walk. To me, it was like an art form and it amazed me. I looked up and saw that I had almost reached the classroom.<p>

It happened so quickly.

A hand grabbed my right wrist. A strong hand. The hand was grasping so tightly on my wrist that my hand had already begun to turn white. I tried to wrench my wrist away but it was no use. So I turned around to face the culprit, even though I knew who it was. Mello's face smirked in my direction, but there was a hint of irritation in his expression. I was shocked for a second, digesting what was going on. Then I clocked on. Looking back towards the group of my classmates, I saw that they were already about a foot away. Some of them were glancing back at me to see what was going on but they must have caught sight of Mello as they all looked sharply away.

He was keeping me back so that we would be alone.

I would have cried out if I could. Looking towards my supposed 'peers' I tried to call out for help, but my mouth seemed glued shut. The fist of fear pulled on my intestines, making me feel sick again. It was tough like the hand on my wrist. I rigorously tried to shake him off and even pushed against him. But he would not let go. I wanted to scream, whimper, anything but my mouth was in cohorts with Mello. I looked back the way the children had gone and to my utter dismay they were already out of sight. I didn't want to look back at Mello. I was so scared! What would happen to me?!

'You've managed to evade me for quite a while now, haven't you?' His voice sent a chill down my neck. I had been careless. So careless and naive! I had thought that maybe I would be fine around people! Yet, he had still managed to catch me out. Tears burned my eyelids as I screwed my eyes shut.

'Answer me you inane animal!' Mello roared. I whimpered at the thundering voice. My ears were ringing from the intensity of it. I turned around rapidly.

'Shut up! I don't care!' I screamed in his face. A sharp pain whipped across my face as Mello's free hand collided with my cheek. The impact sent me wobbling a little to the right and the stinging in my face made my eyes water.

'Don't talk to me like that, bitch,' he said in a low voice. I was too in shock to even realise that he had begun to pull me, until a couple of minutes later. I looked around anxiously, my heart beating rapidly against my ribcage. So much so that I thought my bones would break. Where was he taking me?! It was then that I realised it was just me and him. Even his friends weren't with us. For some reason this heightened my horror.

We were soon in front of a door to an empty classroom that was never used. Mello was still gripping onto my wrist relentlessly, which had become quite numb, despite my attempts to struggle away. He opened the door with his free hand and then pushed me and sent me flying onto the dusty linoleum classroom floor. I put my hands out to catch myself but my right hand buckled beneath me, due to the fact I couldn't feel it anymore. I sat up, and nursed my elbow (I had hit the bone upon tumbling to the ground). Mello had clicked the door shut and had now turned towards me. An awful sadistic grin stretched across his face that made me shiver. He stepped towards me.

'So, it's been a long time, hasn't it?' His voice filled the room like poisonous gas. I remained silent and shaking.

'It seems like you've been ignoring me hasn't it?' He growled. I shifted slightly away as he took another step towards me. I shut my eyes again and put my hands to my face, trying to blot him out. I heard him snicker.

'Oh, are you scared?'He snarled. 'Look at you, whimpering on the floor like a dog!' I heard him take another step closer to me. I couldn't take this tension!

'Heh, I guess you are a dog, because you're so stupid. It suits you!' His voice raised in pitch slightly as he chuckled darkly. Another step. I shifted back slightly, attempting to put space between us.

'Hmmm, you are being so obedient right now, I feel like I should let you off,' He said in a mock questioning tone. The anger rose in my chest. I snapped from the tension.

'Let me off for what! I haven't done anything! You're the one who needs to be punished!' I didn't regret what I had said. I knew he was going to attack me anyway; I just wanted him to hurry up and do it! The suspense was so unbearable! I focused on his face, he had a manic expression on his face, but he hadn't stopped grinning.

He looked insane.

I knew what was coming. I knew he would snap. I knew that I had given him the response he wanted. Even though he was going to hurt me anyway, he was toying with me, to see if I would break.

Taking the last few steps left between us, he quickly bent over and grabbed the front of my dress, pulling me up from the ground slightly. He slapped my face again. I whimpered at the pain. I looked at him out of the corner of my eyes and his face was so close to mine, I felt like he was going tear me to shreds with his gleaming, canine-like teeth. My breathing had become heavy due to my racing heartbeat.

'You stupid dog, now I have to punish you twice! Let's see...that was for talking back to me. Now, how many times did you avoid me? Four? Five? I can't seem to remember. Guess I'll just have to discipline you until you know what you did wrong!' He cried out horrifically. I felt like the dread had paralyzed my whole body. All I could do is stare at him with terrified, wide eyes.

His hand smacked my other cheek. My body was thrown to the side again at the blow, even though he was still holding me by the collar. He didn't stop. He whacked me again and again, until I was sure my face was bright red. Tears were streaming down my face and my face was stinging excruciatingly. I couldn't even back away, as he held me in place. Despite my struggling, he kept me down. I was hitting him in his side, I screamed at him, but it didn't even faze him. He just kept hitting. I screamed for help. Please, let someone hear! Please!

His hand didn't return to my face for a while and I tried to focus on him, although, my eyes were blurry from the water that from slipping out due to the vicious sting. I felt his other hand release my dress and I slumped to the floor, exhausted. I let out a string of whimpers at the pain, as I cupped my hands to my face. The cool temperature of my hands soothed the soreness and hot ache.

'Now, do you understand what you did wrong, dog? Or do I need to carry on punishing you?' I tried to answer, but I just sobbed. I heard him growl and saw him come closer. I panicked, but before I could say anything, he had brutally kicked the side of my waist. His foot had collided with my hip bone, and a sharp twinge shot down the side of my body. I wailed in agony.

'I said, do you understand?! You damn dog!' His voice boomed, the sound echoing and bouncing against the walls of the empty classroom. Another sharp throbbing erupted in my body. I quickly cried out in protest.

'No! Please!' He stopped just as he was raising his foot back for another kick. He leered.

'Something you want to say?'

'Please...no more...please,' I gasped out. He growled.

'Beg! Ask for my forgiveness! Then maybe I'll think about it!' my insides recoiled. He was going to make me do something so humiliating? I sobbed again. He raised his foot again. I threw my arms in his direction, gesturing him to wait.

'Please! Please, don't hurt me anymore!'

'Beg!' He lashed out me again in his impatience and the pain was intensified. I cried out, my voice also echoing.

'Okay! Please! I beg you! Please, don't hurt me! P...please...forgive me,' I mumbled the last part.

'What was that, dog?!' He bent down and brought his hand to my face again, this slap caused my cheek to flame up again but I didn't even try to stop him. I was so worn out and battered.

'Forgive me! I never meant to ignore you! I won't ever ignore you again! I promise! Just don't hurt me again! Please!' My voice came out as wracking bawl. There was silence for a few seconds, apart from my whimper and gasps.

'Good enough. I think you're punishment is fair. But don't you forget it, dog.' He stood back up from his bent position. 'Make sure you don't forget your promise to never ignore me, otherwise I'll make you pay!' He drawled sickeningly. I curled over, holding the side of my waist that he had kicked. He sneered, sinisterly and then I heard his footsteps walking away from me. The door open and closed with a click and he was gone.

All that was left in room was my beaten self and the sound of heavy breathing and whimpers that came from my mouth. I hated him! I wished he was dead!

I was at loss at what to do. I had no idea how to escape this hell.


	10. Alone

**AN: Hello again, I just wanted to say that I really appreciate the reviews people leave on the story, so thanks. :)**

**Just to let you know, now that I've reached chapter ten of this story, I'm going to work on my other ongoing story _'We Only Part To Meet Again'_, until I reach chapter ten on that story, and then I'll come back to this. Sorry about that!**

**So here is the new chapter and even though it's quite short, I hope you enjoy it. :) **

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><p>I peered round the frame of the door into the toy room and my hopes rose when I saw him sitting in the corner, playing with a blank puzzle. I sighed. What was I doing here? Would he actually help me? In any other situation I would have turned back around and gone straight back to my room, but...I was desperate. I sucked in a breath and walked into the room, and took confident strides towards him. When I reached him, I stood in front of him and waited for him to look at me. But he didn't. I blushed with embarrassment at being ignored.<p>

'Near?' I called out. He still didn't look up at me, but after a few seconds of awkward silence, he responded.

'What do you want?' He asked slotting a puzzle piece into its rightful place. I scowled slightly.

'I wanted to ask you about a problem that I have.' I figured that if I was going to ask him, I might as well be honest. After all, he was most likely going through the same thing as I was. This thought clamed me down slightly. I felt a sort of bond with this person as we were experiencing similar problems. However what he asked next made me rethink my evaluation of him.

'Why are you asking me?' I internally cringed at this question. He was so intimidating! Even though he was younger than me, and despite the fact I was standing over him as he was sitting down on the carpeted floor.

'Erm, because I feel like...you might be able to relate,' I mumbled. This apparently caught his attention as he stopped what he was doing and looked up at me with the blank, neutral stare that he had always adopted.

'And how is that, please tell me?'

'Well, you see, it's about...Mello.' upon saying his name, I shuddered. This didn't go unnoticed by Near. I stayed silent, expecting Near to say something, but again he said nothing, just continuing to stare at me. I decided to just come out with it, but my heart was now beating ridiculously fast, and my palms were beginning to get sweaty.

'Erm, well, you see...I have noticed how Mello seems to bully you, and I was just wondering how you deal with it, because, you see...Mello is also kind of bullying me as well, and it's quite hard to ignore, so I was just wonderi-'

'Mello doesn't bully me.' He interrupted me. What did he mean Mello doesn't bully him? It was a well known fact in the orphanage. Did I hear wrong? But...everyone always says that Mello hates the fact that he is second best to Near?

'But, Mello always harasses you?' I blurted out in my confusion. Near turned away from me again and went back to his puzzle.

'Correct. However, I wouldn't term it as bullying. Mostly because of the fact that I don't let his harassment bother me, and generally, Mello is just a fly that buzzes around one's ear a lot. I just ignore the buzzing, if you see what I mean.' I scowled again. What the hell? What's this about a pest? Surely if he ignores him, then Mello would get violent? That was just how Mello worked, wasn't it?

'Well, surely Mello is violent towards you if you talk to him with that attitude?!' I cried. Near peered up at me again, with an inquisitive look embedded in his expression.

'Why would Mello act aggressively towards me? He respects me too much to resort to vicious attacks,' He stated.

What?

What?! What was he talking about?

Mello didn't bully him or wasn't aggressive towards him? Irritation and anger began to build up inside me.

If Mello didn't hit Near, or attack him, then why did he do it to me?! Could Near be lying? Or was I the only one Mello had decided to hurt? But what about the boy Mello had driven to killing himself?

But then I realised.

That was the fundamental difference between me and Near. He was clever and I was not. Where Mello sees him as a rival, it's nothing more than competition between them, yet in my case, Mello saw me as just a weak and stupid animal. Tears burned at my eyes.

So if Near wasn't bullied by Mello, then there was no one I could talk to? No one to help me? No one who understood? My throat began to constrict at the stress.

I was all alone.

Left alone to suffer the torment from Mello. Left alone to suffer the wrath of his fury. My emotions raged around inside of my shell. Why me?!

All alone.

Near had brushed off my questions, but still, he must have realised? He must have realised the violence Mello was inflicting on me? Couldn't he tell by my questions that I was the brunt of Mello's vicious nature?! However, he had clearly ignored by plea for help! I clenched my fists and realised my whole body was shaking. I didn't look to see if Near had noticed the inner dialogue that was occurring inside my head. I didn't care. He was so selfish! All he cared about was himself and his position on the league tables! He didn't care enough to help someone who was helplessly suffering at the hands of his rival! No one cared!

I ran out of the room, away from Near. Away from the carelessness of humanity. I dashed towards my own room. With the four walls that bordered a space of emptiness. The emptiness that was waiting for me, void of any human life but mine. It made sense; I lived a life of solitude, I lived a life of loneliness, and I guessed that life wanted me to stay that way. It wanted me to suffer in silence, to be alone.

I had to suffer alone.


End file.
